Tuesday

The silicon mold came out nice, I did a few more, but to mold in chocolate was harder than I thought. I tried lower temperatures when melting the chocolate, I tried different chocolates, but my pralines still dont come out right. Either the chocolate becomes grainy or white "stains" appear after 1 day. I made super tasty fillings even, passionfruit ganache and nougat, and I spend so much time on making the pralines that I now lost the lust of doing it. My patience is gone. And I ate so much pralines that I feel sick.
Lately I have been feeling that we are doing so many other things all the time (in this course), that is taking my focus away from my project. When we started this term I was feeling inspired, but we are doing workshops, reading, theory, weeklong printing/materials/drawing workshops, WHEN are we gonna start with our thing? Tomorrow I know, but now, because of the stress of trying to read difficult texts and everything else, I lost all the inspiration I had when we started. I lost it. I feel that everything is overwhelming right now. I cant concentrate or start again.
It did feel a little bit better today after speaking to Steven.

The only thing that feels good right now is my training. I went on a boxing camp in the weekend! It was great, we did kool tests like brutalbänken, the theory was interesting, and the training was excellent. My tests went ok, for not being an elite boxer. All my muscles ache! I like it!

Thursday

Today I was making my very first silicon mold, not sure if it will be ok cause I had too little silicon. Tomorrow I will start molding my little chocolate pralines! So far I like this week. Last week I was ill and very tired, but im getting better!

The changes. I have been hanging out, calling and e-mailing my friends more. And its nice, actually, but I must say that it takes TIME to hang out. I dont have much time. Im busy with school and I take care of my son (alone). Whenever I have a babysitter I go to train boxing. And soon I will start working aswell 1 day/week. 

The sugar is harder. I have cut down, but I did not have a sugarfree day yet...But Im on it, ok! Its not only the sugar that is the problem. I decided that I will change my whole diet and become super healthy. Now I started to train again after 5 weeks of relaxing and Argentinian icecream. Monday I´m going for a bodyscan, to check muscles, water, fat and all kinds of stuff and then they will tell me how much protein and such I need to maximise my training. And next weekend I´m going to a boxing camp, where we will do physical tests, learn about strategic boxing and train!